Me: “Charlie, make sure you bring your backpack in the house.”
Charlie: (whiny voice) “But I don’t want to!”
Me: (over exaggerating) “You have an infectious disease and we need to clean it.”
Today is a day that I’m not okay. I’ve been working my ass off (literally) and holding all my shit together. But I’m sorry, not today. I need a day to not be okay. I need a day to cry and not to worry about being the strong one. If I don’t then I’m gonna break; Break into a tiny million pieces. And it’s okay that I’m not okay.
So let me start over.
Yesterday morning I witnessed a car accident right in front of me. A truck hit a car that was turning in next to me at my daughter’s school. It was pretty bad. All I heard was a horn honk and then “CRASH!” The car did a complete 360 right in front of me. All I could do was sit there, hands over my mouth in complete shock, frozen. It was a mom. She’s pregnant, has a 1 year old, and was dropping her kindergartner off at school. I can’t imagine how she felt. I was so close that I could see the complete shock on her face when her car stopped. Everyone is physically fine, but I pray that everyone is emotionally okay.
My day goes on and everything seems fine. Pick up Charlie from school and check out the cause of poison ivy I think he has to see if it got better or worse. It has spread, more bumps have formed and the ones he had got bigger. So I call the doc just to see what’s going on. Well I was wrong. Charlie has what’s called Impetigo. Not exactly an infectious disease, but it is a staff infection and it’s highly contagious. It’s not serious or deadly or anything like that, but my beautiful little boy is covered in a nasty blistering rash all over one leg. He can’t wear shorts for 2 days (his favorite) and has to be super careful with the other kids (bleached and lysoled my whole house). They put him on an oral antibiotic, antibiotic cream and a steroid cream. When he woke up this morning, it looked even worse. I know the medicine is going to work, and that he won’t be contagious after 24 hrs, but I just wanted to cry when I looked at him.
My life could be worse, yes. But it is also okay to take a day to not be okay.